Is it logical to let others lead my life choices for 12 months?  Is it logical to share long journal entries filled with personal emotional and physical details via the internet each week?  Was it logical to jump rope insanely until I  sprained my ankle or was there logic in the days of silence communicating only in written post-it notes?  What about the time I spent an hour floating naked in an isolation chamber in a random New York City apartment? Hmmmm now that’s a hard one to find logic in! I really haven’t been working too hard on sharpening my “logical living” skills this past year. I’m not worried though.  I feel pretty good about what’s unfolded thus far and am beginning to believe putting faith in the act of letting go is in itself it’s own form of logic.

It’s not surprising that I have resisted my final Living Chapter’s task  – the life goal logic model.  I have always felt strongly and have vehemently stated that living one’s life can not really be “modeled” and that life itself does not fit into a box.  I don’t believe that filling out a quiz can depict my personality and I have problems creating “profiles” that upload my lifestyle in Instagram images.  I find myself checking the “other” box frequently on forms and cringing when people ask me to choose a “genre” that suits me best.   I have looked outward from this perspective and fought my way through 37 years defending my sentiments.

Oddly enough, as driven and motivated as I am, I have also fought the idea of creating “life goals” or “life plans”.  I felt as if setting these end points or lists of things/desires or accomplishments would limit me from becoming who I was or could be without restrictions.  But what is really limiting me? Could it be my resistance in general? Is it the fear or dislike of wandering down this particular “scary” logic avenue that may be keeping me from my chosen destination?  Is it a fear of choosing what I really want? These questions have agitated me to the point of action so I have finally decided to stop resisting and just dove into my last chapter challenge of creating the life goal logic model.

So what is a logic model? Good question! Take a peek at these images  And if you want to learn more after being (inundated by these graphs and charts) read up here on what Wikipedia has to say. I went directly off of Elizabeth’s guidelines in her chapter outline. My logic model consists of rows each holding a “life goal” and four columns each outlining the steps taken to achieve those goals and the impacts and outcomes of accomplishing the goals.  The columns are as follows:

• INPUT: what do I have to put in (or be) to make this goal reality?
• ACTIVITIES: what things to I need to do to make this a reality?
• OUTPUT: What is created when I do these activities?
• OUTCOMES: What is changed, disrupted or benefited from these actions

Elizabeth would be very proud to know that I probably spent at least 3 – 4 hours organizing my life desires into the little boxes of this chart.  She may not be proud of my poor chart making/design abilities but the good stuff came out of the thinking and feeling that went into filling these boxes.  Doing this tedious exercise now has me seeing through some slightly different logic lenses.  Doing this not only helped me move beyond the fear of stating and deciding on the things I want in life looking forward, but it even forced me to map out some definite plans to achieve them.  However, I am still not convinced that this process on its own is enough for me.

I believe that the “life plan logic model” seems to be missing one VERY important column.  It’s called “unpredictable out of our control LIFE”.  If we were really to assess our life goals and create a plan to achieve them, would we not have to account for LIFE itself? All the unexpected miracles, disasters, and chaos that comes along with it.  Would we not have to account for our environment and others in our lives that also have life goals and ambitions? All of which is something that can definitely not fit into a box and often can not be predicted.

Yes, I must admit that logic is a useful and necessary tool in the task of planning and presenting a future goal. It is a great guide to get started, motivated, even organized! Its like planning your garden and planting the seeds. There is no harvest without the initial efforts.  However, in addition, I also believe in becoming highly attuned to the changing tides, weather patterns, and the seismic shifting plates of the earth. Without the preparation and the ability to accept and adapt to life’s next curve ball, all life plans are lost on their own.  What seems logical to me is learning to understand the importance of and the logic behind letting in the bits of logic that work for you and letting go of all the rest. You know what they say “the best laid plans”…

For those that are interested in charts: here is my attempt at the “life goal logic model” I took my two list of goals “TO BE” as the main goals and “TO DO” as the activities to achieve the main goals.

 

Life goals: to be, to do, to have, to let go of	Inputs: What I have to put into the goal	Activities:  What I need to do	Outputs: What is physically produced	Outcomes/Impacts: (anticipated or desired) Changes or benefits that may occur
1. To be: HEALTHY	Attention to diet, exercise and spiritual practice	Move: dance, hike, walk, swim Balanced and mindful eating habits, movement and meditation practice	More energy, stronger body, clear mind	Less illness, less stress, positive attitude/life, better relationships
2. To be: LOVING	Commitment, follow through, openness, honesty, time, passion, devotion	LOVE: self, life partner, family, friends, community Playing, talking, thinking, touching, working, listening, confessing, flowing, exchanging, sharing	Friends, confidence, partnership, marriage, family, good work, art, beauty	More love, strong relationships, commitment, strong values, whole self, whole communities, transformation
3. To be: OPEN	Ability to say yes, ability to not project, ability to be vulnerable, ability to accept others	Absorb and learn Trying new things, talking to strangers, accepting challenges, being uncomfortable, being spontaneous	New experiences, adventure, fun, strange days, full living	new self knowledge, increased intuition, increased confidence
4. To be: PRODUCTIVE	Ideas, time, focus, effort, drive, structure	Write: blog, book, letters, articles Following structured steps, reading photographing, editing, thinking, sharing,	Articles, blog posts, audio pieces, books, art, experiences, events, talks, letters, emails	Exchange of ideas, inspired thinking, sharing of expression, stronger relationships, stronger values, more opportunities
5. To be: BALANCED	Restraint, awareness, objective thinking, light and dark, silence and communication	Absorb: listen and learn all that I have space for, nature, knowledge, energy Experience/accept resistance, give/receive equally, address hopes/fears, moderation, spend less/make more $	Healthy diet, healthy body, clear mind, more savings, less stress, less worry, less struggle	healthy relationships, stable finances, increased mental focus and clarity, happier environment
6. To be: MINDFUL	Awareness, attention to detail, time, meaning, care, commitment, curiosity	Meditate: center balance listen, be in present Think and assess before acting, make promises, keep promises, ask and answer questions	Change of habits, greater understanding of others and the environment,	More peaceful and positive environment and stronger relationships

 

7. To be:  FLUID/FLEXIBLE	Trust, courage, creativity, willingness, openness	Move:dance,hike,walk, swim Create open life structure, say yes, compromise, focus on the moment, respond to the present actions not past or future	Annoying reactions from non fluid thinkers, new ideas, experiences, mindfulness	Confusion, clarity, present moment living, growth and death of experiences
8. To be: GIVING	Time, love, care, money, work, thought, acceptance, passion	Love myself fully, Share: talks workshops, radio interviews be with others, talk to others, write, listen, think of others, volunteer, donate time or money or creations	Confidence, friendship, partnership, good intention, gratitude	Shared experience, model to follow, healthy relationships, healthier communities better businesses,
9. To be: GRATEFUL	Awareness, humility, awe	Collect and highlight others’ stories, audio, and imagesMake gratitude lists, say thank you, recognize others generosity	Warmth, love, validation	Increased giving, stronger relationships, validation, contentment amongst giver and receiver
10. To be:  HONEST/TRUSTING	Vulnerability, loyalty	Connect: nourish and create relationships Seek the truth, avoid secrets, share openly, banish lies, make promises, keep promises	More honesty, more trust	Stronger relationships, quicker solutions, less drama
11. To be: DISCIPLINED	Time, devotion, commitment, organization,consistency	Focus: hone skills in writing, audio editing Create structure, make lists, follow lists, set limits, boundaries, guidelines, make promises, keep promises	Satisfaction, accountability, productive habitsGreater focus	Higher productivity, Higher success rates, Greater self-confidence, Increased skills
12. To be: COURAGEOUS	Trust, confidence, curiosity,	Explore: natural landscape, cityscape, new territories Take risks, push boundaries, break rules, be creative	Independence,Adventure, confidence, new skills	New opportunities, breakthroughs, transformation

6/27/14